.Editor's Note: The observing is the text of a character coming from Trip 3 Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Retired), assessing the events of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written very much about specifics of the purpose in the course of the month I have actually been actually listed here, generally for two explanations: the 1st being that there has actually been really little opportunity to do that kind of writing, and second of all because I'm unsure exactly how relaxed I am actually sharing ideas I provide friends and family with the remainder of the planet.Effectively, certainly the world changed today. What I point out or even do is actually incredibly slight compared to the value of what took place to our nation today when it was actually attacked through ... through whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we understand, I presume. Difficult to recognize at whom to drive our anger and also fear ...I had actually just ended up an amount of activities this morning, the best lengthy being the physical examinations of all crew participants. In a personal conversation observing that, the flight cosmetic surgeon informed me they were actually possessing an incredibly negative time on the ground. I possessed no tip ...He illustrated the condition to me as greatest he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was overwhelmed, after that terrified. My 1st notion was that this wasn't a true talk, that I was still paying attention to one of my Tom Clancy strips. It only didn't seem to be achievable on this scale in our country. I could not even imagine the particulars, also just before the headlines of more devastation started being available in.Vladimir came over fairly swiftly, sensing that something extremely severe was being discussed. I swung Michael into the component at the same time. They were actually likewise blown away and also stunned. After we authorized off, I made an effort to describe to Vladimir and Michael as ideal I might the prospective enormity of the show of terror in downtown Manhattan and at the Pentagon. They precisely comprehended and were very considerate.I browsed the World Chart on the personal computer to see where over the world our team were and also noticed that our team were actually coming southeast away from Canada as well as would certainly be passing over New England in a couple of mins. I zipped around the terminal up until I located a home window that will offer me a view of New York City and got the closest video camera. It happened to become a camera, and I was appearing south coming from the home window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke appeared to have a strange bloom to it at the foundation of the column that was actually streaming south of the metropolitan area. After reading through among the news articles our company just acquired, I feel we were looking at NY around the time of, or quickly after, the crash of the second high rise. Just how dreadful ...I scanned the electronic camera during the East Coast to the south to view if I could find some other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or anywhere else, yet nothing was visible.It was quite difficult to consider job afterwards, though our team had some to carry out, but on the upcoming track our team went across the US additional south. All 3 people were operating one or two video cameras to make an effort to obtain viewpoints of The big apple or even Washington. There was fog over Washington, but no certain source can be observed. Everything looked fabulous from a couple of hundred kilometers away. I can't envision the heartbreaking settings on the ground.Apart from the psychological effect of our country being attacked as well as thousands of our consumers and possibly some good friends being gotten rid of, the absolute most difficult sensation being actually where I am is among solitude.Upcoming time ... I suppose the fatigue and also emotional strain obtained the best of me. I couldn't stay awake as well as remain to write. Today was still difficult, yet our experts started obtaining more info, plus we had the tribute of chatting straight with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, who guaranteed our company that the ground crews will remain to operate and ensure our safety and security, as well as the risk-free procedure of the Place. Our experts additionally heard from our Manager, Mr. Goldin, who included that the partners in the Plan are actually all entirely committed to continuing safe functions and assistance. These were never ever concerns for me. I understand all these folks! The ground groups have been actually incredibly supporting, very understanding of the influence of the news, and have attempted to become as useful as feasible. They have all been incredibly qualified and concentrated though I can't think of the diversion of this particular type of information being available in as well as the thought that government structures could be in jeopardy. They never ever bypassed a beat, even when moving control centers. And a group of senior workers and pals gave our team a rather comprehensive rundown about what was actually understood and what was actually being performed in the government and also at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was extremely beneficial and also sort of them to accomplish in the middle of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has additionally been actually encouraging as well as handy, trying to uplink news articles when our own resources were actually inoperable, as well as pointing out kind terms ...My crewmates have been actually excellent, too. They recognize it is actually been a challenging day for me and the people on the ground, as well as they've attempted to be as also keeled as well as practical as achievable. Michael also repaired me my favored Borscht soup for dinner. As well as they give me lots of area to think when I needed it. They are actually incredibly understanding and also certainly outraged at whoever would certainly do this.I know many people in Washington, numerous folks who travel to DC and also New York City, numerous that are actually captains, that I felt certain I would certainly acquire at least a few items of trouble over the upcoming few times. I acquired the very first one today when I discovered that the Captain of the American Airlines plane that struck the Government was actually Chic Burlingame, a classmate of mine. I encountered Chic during cadet summer when our company remained in the D&B together, and also our experts had great deals of lessons together. I can't imagine what he must of undergone, and also currently I hear that he might have climbed even further than we may even think about through potentially preventing his airplane coming from being the one to attack the White Property. What a horrible loss, yet I make sure Chic was actually combating bravely throughout. And also rips don't flow the same precede ...It's difficult to describe exactly how it feels to become the only American totally off the earth at once including this. The sensation that I need to exist along with every one of you, taking care of this, assisting somehow, is actually overwhelming. I know that our company perform the threshold (or even past) of a horrendous switch in the history of the world. Several things will definitely certainly never coincide again after September 11, 2001. Not merely for the manies thousand as well as lots of people straight affected through these hideous process of violence, but probably for we all. Our team will find our own selves feeling in different ways concerning dozens of traits, featuring probably area exploration, unfortunately.It's unpleasant to observe smoke cigarettes putting from wounds in your own nation from such a superb angle. The dichotomy of being on a spacecraft devoted to strengthening live on the planet and watching lifestyle being damaged by such willful, horrendous actions is actually jolting to the mind, no matter that you are. And also the understanding that everything are going to be actually various than when our experts launched due to the opportunity our company land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation as well as in our leadership that our experts will certainly perform everything achievable to better guard her as well as our loved ones, as well as to bring fair treatment for what has been carried out. I have self-confidence that the great folks at NASA will certainly carry out every little thing important to proceed our purpose carefully and also return our team safely at the correct time. And I skip every one of you quite. I can not exist along with you face to face, and we have a very long way to head to complete our objective, however be certain that my soul is along with you, and also know you remain in my petitions.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the last character ... Fortunately, it is actually been actually an active full week up listed here. As well as to verify that, like our country, our team are actually advancing our designated path with business customarily (as long as possible). Tonight the latest addition to the place, the Russian Docking Compartment will be actually introduced coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (United States time), it will certainly dock with our company, at a slot never ever made use of just before on the low point side of the Solution Component. This brand new component is going to provide us an additional area to dock a Progress or even Soyuz as well as are going to deliver a large airlock along with pair of able to be used hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan satisfies, which our experts will certainly carry out a few of before we come home.The concern before in dealing with recently was actually inadequate information. The complication now is way too much. It arrived simultaneously when e-mail was restored, and there's not nearly enough time to read it all! Plus it is actually as well hard to cope with all of it immediately. However I cherish receiving it, as well as I truly appreciate the terrific letters of help and companionship I am actually getting.Our company are actually succeeding on board, receiving our work performed, as well as discussing things. Final night we possessed a lengthy conversation over dinner regarding the implication of these activities, the achievable activities to adhere to, and what must be done. After dinner, Michael challenged telling me that every e-mail he got coming from buddies in Russia said specifically to inform me how sorry they were actually that this occurred, extending their acknowledgements, and talking to just how I was performing. Vladimir showed me the Russian phrase for "condolences" after speaking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian as well as the English words are actually considerably too lengthy to verbalize simply.) Incredibly types people.For the last two days, the Russian MCC has been good enough to send real-time shows of radio news regarding the activity and associated tales, to make certain I was well educated. Every expert who has begun free throw line to cover a technique or even a trouble has at some aspect extended hellos to me along with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom told our team that due to the wedding day of recognition in the United States, all day people had actually been actually delivering blossoms and lining all the wall surfaces of the United States embassy in Moscow, as well as this evening they were igniting candle lights in the street outside the consular office. How the world has actually changed.Individuals everywhere seem to be to acknowledge the senselessness as well as horror within this assault. And also the tremendous loss. Moscow has actually handled these sort of issues in the final couple of years with apartment or condo and also train bombings, so they are as distressed to do away with this risk as our experts are actually. Yet the bottom collection is actually that there are excellent individuals everywhere that want to live in calmness. I read through that a youngster inquired, "United States is thus great to various other nations, we regularly aid everybody, just how can they dislike our company a lot?".I hope the example of cooperation as well as rely on that this space capsule and all individuals in the program demonstrate daily will someday inspire the rest of the world to function the same way. They must!However, our experts won't be flying over the US while individuals are igniting candle lights. Don't recognize if our team could possibly view that anyway. We performed, having said that, find a quite unusual and beautiful view a handful of moments ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz enhancer. Our company were eclipsing it and also it appeared regarding three moments after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sun attacked our station, so it was actually still at night. It resembled a large comet with a straight, large tail silhouetted versus the darker world beneath. Despite some bad lighting fixtures for some time as the sun struck our window at a reduced position, I handled some online video of it as first our experts passed the spacecraft, and then enjoyed it begin to catch up as it acquired elevation and speed. I filmed up until main engine cutoff as well as enhancer separation occurred equally we approached sunrise on the Himalayas. An unforgettable attraction in an unforgettable week ...Lifestyle takes place, also precede. We're here to remain ... Frank.